be you, fake people, pretends

Pretending to be someone you’re not

Have you ever noticed that some people likes ”the game” of pretending to be…?

I think every woman and man from this earth, pretended, for at least few minutes, that they are someone else, not them. Do we call this types of people, FAKE PEOPLE?

Yes, I wanna talk about FAKE PEOPLE, they are all around us. I feel like I wanna give names, but no, Momma said to be NICE 🙂 Just kidding.

I couldn’t say about myself that I have never been FAKE, I did, because it is in our human nature to wear masks. But the key is do you ever stop wearing the masks, do you ever think before deciding who you wanna be today, or do you stop being FAKE, and start being YOURSELF, the real one?

I have received a lot of arguments, comments when I say what I think, or when I give my true opinion, they say ”No Crina, we do not have to say it this way, wow Crina, yeah you right, or they try to wear the angry, fierce mask, or simply they look at me and smile, laugh, with their big eyes open. The thing is that I do not care, I simply wanna be myself.

People pretend to be someone else behind a computer, on social media, at their place of work, at school, or even around their own family. But, deeply inside they can only identify the TRUE, and who they actually are.

My husband read this article and said ”we will always wear a mask, because when we are sad, we do not wanna to show this feeling to people, so we are wearing the “HAPPINESS MASK”.

And this is the reality, especially men are wearing this mask, for them it’s hard to open up, speak about what they feel. For a woman is easy, she goes to work and starts talking about the sadness in her life. Now is this a weakness point?

It’s important to trust GOD to let him change your life, be YOU, be real!

You are unique, nobody is like you, be careful who you trying to be, if you copy a person, or you wearing a wrong “MASK” you can destroy your own unique life!

“Share your weaknesses. Share your hard moments. Share your real side. It’ll either scare away every fake person in your life or it will inspire them to finally let go of that mirage called “perfection,” which will open the doors to the most important relationships you’ll ever be a part of.”
― Dan Pearce, Single Dad Laughing

Photo by Laurentiu Robu on Pexels.com
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4 Types Of Parenting Styles

I studied social work and I remember the teachers talking about the types of parenting, also recently I have done some online courses about childcare, briefly these types were mentioned.

What are they and how they are affecting the children?

Most probably if you are a parent, you can identify your style, or if you are not a parent, like me, we can identify our parents style. Parenting style has a big impact in child life.

Authoritarian– STRICT, this style is about being strict, it’s about the rules. Parents with an authoritarian style have very high expectations of their children, yet provide very little in the way of feedback. If a child does mistakes, most probably they will be punished and sometimes the authoritarian tends to abuse the child in a physical way.

characteristics of authoritarian parents:

They have little to no patience for misbehaviourAuthoritarian parents expect their children to simply know better than to engage in undesirable behaviour. 

They don’t give children choices or options

They don’t express much warmth or nurturing

The children of authoritarian parents tend to exhibit these effects:

  • They associate obedience with love
  • Some children display aggressive behaviour outside.
  • Some children may act shy around others
  • Children often have lower self-esteem.

Permissive Parenting – Avoids confrontation, they wanna be friend instead of parent, they use rewards or a bribe in order to get the child to do what they wanna do. They rarely discipline their child, there are no rules to follow. Instead of setting rules, they try to prevent problems from happening, they choose to let their child to figure things out for themselves.

Characteristics of permissive parenting:

Emphasise their children’s freedom rather than responsibility

Ask their children’s opinions on major decisions

Are usually very loving towards their kids.

The children of permissive parents tend to exhibit these effects:

poor academic performance and behavioral problems.

Display more aggression and less emotional understanding

they lack motivation, discipline. Also the kids are more likely to engage in underage alcohol, smoking use.

Authoritative Parenting – This type has high standards, expectations. But is balanced with respect, warmth, encourage independence. They are responsive to the child’s emotional needs while having high standard. They might set limits, rules and are very consistent in enforcing boundaries. This Type has been shown to be the best way in treating and raising your child because it leads to the best outcomes in child like better social skills, emotional health, the kid is more secure and attached to their parents.

Characteristics of authoritative parenting:

Leads to development of a cooperative/friendly structure where the child’s spontaneous initiations is encouraged.

They encourage, support, and are sensitive to needs

Creates family unity through compassion, inclusion and respect.

Gives child plenty of affection which result in a sociably child, happy and ready to recognise peoples emotions and also to help them.

The children of authoritative parents tend to exhibit these effects:

Compassionate with others

happy, loving and caring person

Trustworthy, respectful

Confident in abilities. Capable and involved.

Uninvolved/Neglectful parenting – This type is the most harmful of all. Unfortunately because of circumstances in their life, like divorce, drugs, poverty, or sometimes just because they chose to. Sometimes dads can have this style when they do not have a presence in their child’s life, and this can be really damaging. I am praying to God for the children with this type pf parenting.

Characteristics of neglectful parenting:

No affection or guidance given to the child

Likely a substance abuser

Lacks emotional attachment to child

Don’t attend school events and parent-teacher conference

Offer little or no supervision

Do not plan children’s education, future.

Do not care about the child needs

Usually are not interested of sending kids to extracurricular activities.

The children of neglectful/uninvolved parents tend to exhibit these effects:

Low self-esteem, self-reliant. Forced to act mature even though he/she is a child.

Depressed, sad, lonely

No emotional connection between parent and child

The have a hard time forming relationships with other people.

Anxiety.